Posted by The Happy Tutor
The nice man at Gifthub, working to help families pass on their family values, might find this ditty helpful in his professional capacity.
The Finest Fucking Family
If you're ever down in London, and you have no place to go
And you cannot find a spot to sit you down,
For a penny on deposit you can hire a water closet
And a season ticket costs but half-a-crown.
There's a gent's convenience at the corner of Waterloo
And a ladies' one a little further down,
If you've an aching in your heart we get a penny for a fart
We own every public lavat'ry in town.
Have you met my sister Tilly? She's a whore in Picadilly
And my mother is another on the strand;
And my father hawks his asshole round the walls of Windsor Castle
We're the finest fucking family in the land.
Have you met my Uncle Hector? He's a cock and ball inspector
At a celebrated English public school,
And my brother sells French letters and a patent cure for wetters
And an ointment for the sores upon your tool.